Tuesday 31 January 2012

Mr. MacGregor ... Mary Poppins and other such nonsense...

Greetings to YOU all.

Australia is reading MY Blog.. Yes, Dear Reader, on the Stats, Australia has gone GREEN which means they are laughing and smiling and doing the Fandango with the rest of YOU.

YOU are unaware of the fact that YOU do the Fandango because it is a secret between ME and YOUR inner self, aka YOUR facial muscles. YOU don't believe ME, hahaha, don't tell GROSS fibs and say that YOU read MY Blog with a straight face, because, I for one, do not believe it.

NO-one reads MY Blog with a straight face, even I don't and I write it! But I suppose I laugh and smile at the stories because I played one of the lead roles and, therefore, remember the happenings OR I am / was fortunate to be privy to most of the characters involved and they spilt the beans and gave ME the low-down, aka, the inside Tale.

WE were at The Studio today and a mighty happy day it was too... oh indeedy, yes it was!

Studio Owner and I were chewing the fat about something up in the drawing room and Lovely Assistant called for US both to come into the office... WE scurried down the stairs, LA was white with excitement... and WHAT excitement it was too... for there, on the computer screen, was the on-line banking and it showed that a magical amount of money had been paid in.

OH Halleluiah.. a commission that Studio Owner had quoted for in the middle of LAST year had been signed off by this lovely client in Paris, then there was an email with a copy of the Purchase Order giving details of the order that the 50% payment belonged to which WE had received. Then another email was received from the same client, they want more stuff... lots and lots of more stuff.

How wonderful, how simply "blooming marvellous" in fact and now I quote from Mary Poppins, "Supercalifragalisticexpealidocus" because this means a great deal of work for many of Studio Owner's most beloved and dearest experts, bullion dealers, casters, polishers, engravers, glass blowers, spinners, mould makers, oh, lots and lots of work for them all, YOU see in making something glorious by hand, many people make up a team of Craftsmen and EVERY single one of these people are MAJOR Craftsmen, who produce the very highest quality merchandise.

So, I do hope that the very little 'BIG' man in Paris reads MY Blog... "for WE do manufacture stuff in England Monsieur S...... and extremely fine 'STUFF' it is too".

In the afternoon SHE settled down with the list of chores that were to be done, one of the chores SHE had to do was to telephone the company who are hosting Studio Owner's Exhibition in November, SHE said "Hello" to this man and he responded by saying "how are you both, is GeeGee with you in the office?"... much laughter was then laughed as he explained that he had never walked into a room and seen an African Grey Parrot sitting on someone's head before and that he would remember the sight forever... SHE laughed and 'confessed' that, indeed, I was sitting on HER head at that very moment.

As I am at this precise moment as SHE writes this for me... I always stay 'quite' close to make sure that SHE doesn't slip something into MY Blog without ME noticing, YOU know what 'parents' are like, give them an inch and the next minute THEY are trying to exercise Parental Rights, uh, I get ole Beaky into action when I feel that mood coming upon her and threaten HER with a few bars of "old MacGregor had a farm...", SHE's not daft and HER eyes slide to the bookshelves where SHE has HER MOST beloved books that SHE keeps in a 'secure' place, these are the one's that have never had the pleasure of meeting Beak...

A nibble here, a nibble there, everywhere a nibble-nibble.... YOU see, Dear Reader, there are several ways to keep HER on the hop as it were....

But I must NOT tease HER, for SHE has had an extremely busy day and ran about like a rabbit, down Red Lion, down High Holborn, up High Holborn, into Lincoln's Inn Field, SHE had to drop a letter into Fierce Lawyer's office... COR and what an office! Wow, what a magnificent building, phew. Then down the steps, a wiggle through Gate Street, out onto High Holborn, into Red Lion Street, out onto Thoebald's Road, onto Clerkenwell Road, up to Britton Street, back onto Clerkenwell Road and back to the Studio via the Plumber's Merchants.

SHE's a Pensioner, SHE's over 60, when are they treat HER with more due care and consideration?

I will have to keep MY beady eye on HER and make sure SHE doesn't get too tired. Poor SHE, for HER knees are dodgy and they HATE the cold weather, they 'lock' and do horrid things that upset HER.

Bed time for Dollies and WE Dollies are going to go to sleep.. Oooh, that is very grown up of ME, normally I hate the mere thought of bed, please note the lower case letters for I don't want 'bed' aka cage to get ideas above its' station.

Sleep well Dear Reader, funny to think it's nearly midday 'down under' in Australia and those Aussies are reading 'Parrot Tales' by GeeGee. Oh, the power of a Parrot's Blog!

GeeGee Parrot.
January 31st, 2012.

Monday 30 January 2012

Guide to being a Follower

WE received a comment in the box from 'First Follower' asking how to put a photo up.... Help is on the way...

Click on the blue button 'Join this Site' and follow the prompts, this will guide you through to opening a GoogleMail email account / address. Sign in to the Blog using the GoogleMail email address, when you have the Blog up in front of you, click on DASHBOARD on the top, right hand side. A page will open up with Edit Profile, Edit Photo etc, you can either import one of your own photos or use a photo from one provided by the Blog.

That is how you do it...

Well.. hey diddle-diddle... how about that? How very nice that is, another person wants to be made happy! We try pretty hard to do that on MY Blog, sometimes WE are a little bit sad.. but not for long! And generally I think MY Dear Readers will all agree that The Blog spreads an extravagant amount of uncomplicated amusement over a fairly wide area of the world!

What I would jurst LURVE is for ALL of OUR new Followers to let us know where they are living.. Do they have an African Grey Parrot in their house. Tell US about YOU.

By-the-way. Tea was jurst what WE wanted, delicious Soda Bread made with Oat Flour, SHE found it at the Parson's Green Farmer's Market where SHE goes to get HER Goaty Milk from Ellie, a Baker's Stall selling bread that SHE can eat! SHE is highly allergic to Wheat Flour and Cow Dairy, so to be able to get HER bread AND HER cheese and milk from the same place is a major bonus!

Which reminds me that SHE must email Ellie about a leg of Kid... post note to SELF.

WE are going to The Studio tomorrow and SHE is taking a box of HOME GROWN BLACK CHERRIES... SHE picked them last summer, popped them in the freezer and is going to ask Studio Owner to make them a delicious pudding for lunch tomorrow, I am mad about Cherries. I am only allowed to eat them in the kitchen as I get too excited and Black Cherry juice is not good for Yellow Damask.

So early to bed and, hopefully, early to rise.. SHE has been having peculiar dreams, SHE had one about Constance which was most odd about packing clothes into trunks, bizarre indeed.

It was Constance's birthday yesterday, she would have been 95, SHE misses HER mother sometimes, I don't remember MY mother, Beck organised my hatching. WE will write about Becks and the very norty Meerkats another time.

Stay warm Dear Readers and again "Welcome to our NEW First Follower".

GeeGee Parrot.
January 30th, 2012.

Mexico.. Russia.. Ukraine.. please will you write in MY Comments Box.

Hello Dear Readers - wherever you are.

I say "wherever you are" because how about this for some amazing news.. I have been told that there are people as far away as Russia reading MY Blog and I think this is thrilling. I love to think of folk in far-off lands reading MY Tales. I wish they would leave comments in the MY Comments Box, for that is why it is there.. so that folk write stuff, in English please.

Now I know who is reading MY Blog in Mexico, yes indeed, it is Ana Lilia, she is so pretty and she owes us an email with a photograph, a photograph of her at her friend's wedding in the pretty dress that she bought in Texas on her way back to Mexico from staying with US in London.

In Germany WE know that Rosamund reads MY Blog, maybe Lotta, her daughter, does as well, I haven't heard from Lotta for a while but as she has just bought a glorious new home in Hamburg, she is probably very busy making it into a delicious cosy and snug Lotta-Home and also she is busy, hard working Gurl.

WE would love to have lots of photos and news to talk about on MY Blog and WHEN I can get HER to get it all together to do it (properly) I will make sure that YOU get to see photos of ME.. I have never met any of MY Russian or Ukrainian Readers so they MUST see photos of ME ASAP.

Note to SELF to find photos.... also to go and ask HER to make some Tea.

This is a short post for MY lunch was a light one and I KNOW that there is Oat Soda Bread in the bread bin, this together with Goaty Butter, HOMEMADE Black Cherry Jam and a mug (for me) of Lapsang is MY idea of heaven.

Please don't be shy MY Russian and Ukrainian Readers, please write comments in MY Comments Box and join in with the fun, don't be just a number on the STATS of MY Blog. Infact, I don't like to think that ANY of MY Dear Readers are shy, please all write in MY Comments Box and join in the fun and laugh and smile.. and remember what I wrote...

"If you don't use it, YOU will lose it".. fit and toned muscles keep everything up!

I bid YOU all a very snug and warm "Welcome to Parrot Tales" written by MYSELF.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 30th, 2012.

A little nibble here and a BIG munch there, here a nibble, there a nibble...

Greetings Dear Reader. I trust YOU have all been hard at work doing what ever your work is?

The Tale I am about to tell spans FIVE, yes, five decades and starts off in Kent with Hugo and Victoria, if YOU read MY Blog Posts regularly YOU should not have to have it explained to you as to who those names refer to.

It was back in the days when, if you worked in the 'city', you wore a dark suit and Hugo was no exception. Remember the dark bit... Victoria adored Hugo, she jurst LURVED him with a passion which involved getting tremendously over excited when she saw him return from the city at the end of the day. She would RUSH to greet him with joyful bleats but Hugo would put his hands out and say "yes yes, you are such a good girl but stay there", how strange, he always cuddles me, thought Victoria, but Dear Reader, YOU have worked it out haven't you, if not, I'll explain it, dark suit + white goat = white goat hair ALL over dark suit..

He would go and change and come down and then make a HUGE fuss of her.. oh, she jurst lurved that man. And he was 'pretty' fond of her too.

So much so, that one Saturday after lunch, Hugo decided to go to Tenterden by himself and whistling for the dogs, he found that SHE and Constance had gone up into the orchards to pick cherries taking Balu and Ricky with them. Quite why Victoria was left behind was not obvious but she looked at the car and bleated, Hugo wasn't a stupid man and he spoke fluent Goat, so he said "yes, you can come" and off they went.

Unfortunately, for Hugo, he forgot Victoria's lead, she wore a collar and walked to heel and he didn't know that Constance NEVER left Victoria alone in little van, she was either with the two dogs in the back of little van or with Constance on the lead. I know YOU are wondering why she was never left alone, don't worry, sadly it will soon be all too apparent.

Hugo went to the shoe mender, the butcher to order some the meat for a dinner party and the art shop for some supplies, then he fell amongst thieves but knowing that he had left a window open, he stopped to have a cup of tea with John Bryon, who ran an Interior Design shop on the High Street.

After an hour, he said his goodbyes and made his way back to little van. But what was this? Little van appeared to have a frilly curtain hanging down inside the window! And Victoria was sitting IN the driver's seat.... looking pretty smug and Goaty-beyond-belief!

Hugo was devastated.. for Victoria, whose threshold of boredom was at floor level, had become extremely bored with being left by herself and using her very clever upper lip had nibbled and unpicked the roof lining away from the metal and it was hanging down all the way around little van.

Oh dear, Dear Reader, for YOU see 'little van' was Constance's van and she was NOT going to be at all happy, it was Saturday afternoon and the garage repair man closed at 1 o'clock.

They were both in Constance's (very) Black Book for several days.

Fast forward to the 1990's, and SHE and Dagga Parrot were living the life of Riley. Hugo, sadly had died in 1981 and SHE had received the piece of furniture which he had given her when SHE was very young. It is, for SHE has it still, a charming little Queen Anne Oak desk and it sat in HER sitting room with HER Great Grandmother's clock on it with other pretty things.

One day, SHE, too, fell amongst thieves and came home very late. SHE wasn't worried as SHE knew that there was fresh water and a lot of Dagga-Parrot-food for him but SHE had forgotten about the level of boredom...

Actually SHE didn't see the damage until the next morning when SHE went to wind the clock. Oh dear oh dear, for the back of the little, very valuable, Queen Anne desk had been munched. I defy anyone to 'nibble' English Oak which is nearly three hundred years old, Dagga Parrot had given that poor little desk a good munching and the munched oak pieces were lying on the floor behind the desk.

SHE was sad, SHE was sad because the desk had been munched, SHE was very sad because Dagga Parrot had NEVER done anything 'norty' before and SHE was extra sad that HE had been so sad and lonely that HE felt he HAD to munch the poor little Queen Anne Desk.

Everyone was dreadfully sad.. Dagga Parrot then realised that HE had munched something that was very valuable to HER not just in financial terms but valuable because Hugo had given it to HER for HER seventh birthday when the family were living in Dublin.

The mood in the house was pretty 'quiet' for a week or two.

Then I arrive in the 2000's.. and I get a visit from Dagga-Parrot-spirit-in-the-sky, he tipped ME the wink and told ME lots of secret stuff about HER, after all, they were together for nearly seventeen years so HE knew HER very well. But because the desk was the ONLY think HE had ever munched and SHE had forgiven HIM and THEY had forgotten about it, HE didn't think to give ME any strict or severe warnings on munchings or nibblings.

And now I have to raise MY wing.. for I am an addict, I am addicted to cardboard and paper. But worst still, for those of YOU who have read MY Profile this will come as NO shock or surprise, I am absolutely hooked on Hard Backed Books.. it is the spines, I really just can't help it, for they sit there within a beaks-nibbly-nibbly reach on the shelf above the kitchen door.

How was I to know they were HER serious Design and Gardening reference books.. they are /were delicious, a little nibble here and little nibble there.. but I got smacked today. Not really, but SHE picked up that dreaded egg whisk and I had to flap a very swift flight to the pole above the front door and try to get HER to change the subject.

"A little nibble here, a big munch there, here a nibble, there a nibble, everywhere a nibble nibble", it actually goes quite well to the tune of 'Old MacGregor's Got a Farm'.... whoops, I hope SHE didn't hear ME whistle that?

SHE has been working in the kitchen and used all the hot water, so I'll get her to send this whilst Boiler does his boiling job. Back to the Studio tomorrow, WE are looking forward to hearing how Lovely Assistant's dinner at The Dorchester went with his parents on Friday night. Did he remember to take a 'Parrot Bag' home with him, I wonder?

GeeGee Parrot.
January 30th, 2012.

Sunday 29 January 2012

RESCUED...

Oh dear, oh dear Dear Reader. WE lost all our electricity at 5.00 o'clock today. SHE was taking dictation for today's posts and the light went out, thinking it was the bulb, SHE went to switch on another light and found that didn't work either....

MAJOR power failure in the flat. SHE went to look at the fuse box in the boiler room, none of the switches were down in the 'off' position.

Curious

SHE went outside and the three street lamps that are nearest to our house are out, SHE went up into the main house, they have power and so it is just US and three street lamps.

Very curious.

SHE called Gill-at-top-of-street, GIll had power and very sweetly asked HER if SHE would liks to come up to her flat. I am to be left behind.. in the dark... home alone in the dark, probably better really as I would have had to stay in my small cage but it is rather early to go to sleep at, by now, only 5.30 o'clock on a Sunday night. SHE switched the bedroom top light into the 'on' position for when the electricity starts again.

SHE took iPad and Mobile + their chargers and went off to Gill-at-top-of-street.

Gill gave HER a hot water bottle and made HER as snug as a bug on the bed with HER toes under an Alpaca blanket.. THEY watched a film and loaded HER electrical gadgets with power and Gill got HER onto her router, for you see, Dear Reader, no power = NO Router = NO BLOG!

Gill doesn't say 'mean and snippy' things.. "come in out of the cold" was what Gill said.

I don't know when SHE will be back but it is very nice to know that SHE has a friend who would rescue her from a pitch dark flat, give her a hot water bottle, a cup of (goaty) milky coffee and say the English equivalent of "mi casa esta su casa"... my house is your house.

"Thank you Gill-at-top-of-street, thank you for being HER friend".

GeeGee Parrot. (Home alone... in the dark).
January 29th, 2012

Restraint of Tongue & Pen.

Good afternoon. WE trust that all's well with you? WE are and WE are very happy to report that the fridge and the freezer are now full of Ellie's GOATY milk. Ellie looked very well and her stall was busy which is a good thing as it is only her third time at this market and she is getting repeat customers, We are repeat customers and WE are very happy to be such people.

That last phrase 'happy to be such people' brings ME to the title of this post...

Restraint of Tongue and Pen.

Recently SHE sent a text to several friends letting them know about a novel which was published last Sunday on the web, SHE thinks everyone who writes books should be supported.

SHE only sent the text to people whom SHE thought were 'friends' so SHE was somewhat astonished and certainly astounded to receive back the following text.. "Will it be as bad as the Blog that you sent to me?".

HER response to this rather 'strange' text was "oooooh, that's a little sharp from you, no, it won't be but don't worry as you won't get any more (posts of the blog) and in fact, it is SO sharp, I am now deleting it and forgetting that you sent it".

But, when SHE thought about it, SHE realised that it had made HER a little sad that someone whom SHE thought was a friend would not realise that MY Blog, OUR Blog, because it is SHE that types it onto Ms iPad, is only a bit of fun.. SHE doesn't have a lot of fun in HER life, no, it is not for public consumption but SHE is a bit blue (note the lower case letters) at the moment.

And this text was from a woman who has two small toy rabbits that she and her tyre-kicker husband both talk to and travel with.... toy rabbits, yes TOYS, Dear Readers, not real folk with blood in veins like YOU, ME and HER.

I believe that some people simply do not think before they put their hand or mouth into gear.

That is why I ask all of YOU the following question. What do you think goes through people's minds when they say or write mean and snippy things? Does it make them feel happy and toasty-warm 'inside' that they have, perhaps, made someone feel maybe a little 'blue' or worse, SAD? Have they ever seen themselves when they do such things, people are often rude about Parrots to HER. NO, I am not going to tell you what SHE thinks about those people, MY beak is sealed... but I can assure YOU, it ain't polite.

However, what amuses ME is that their faces go all mean and snippy and it doesn't make them look at all attractive OR pretty and the more they say or write mean and snippy things, the more it shows on their face.

So MY moral is "don't say or write mean and snippy things unless you want to end up looking mean and snippy", Constance would have said "bitter and twisted" and she would have been right.

MY 'Parrot Tales' are not, WE know, GREAT Literature. But Dear Reader, WE know that the world is not always the happiest of places. And in OUR minds Great Literature or not (mostly not), Blogs such as OURS, La Vie en Rose and Ellie's Daily Records of her Goaty Folk make people laugh and smile.

Watch the Gossip's face when they recount some little bit of tittle-tat, it won't be a happy one, they may be smiling but it isn't a 'happy' smile, it is a "I know something about ... that you don't" smile but better still, instead of listening to what they are about to tell you, say "No, I don't want to hear or listen to ANY gossip about so-and-so" and change the subject.

I, for one, would far rather MY HER laughed and smiled and typed MY 'BAD' Blog than wrote and SENT snippy text messages... for what I find interesting is that SHE doesn't have many lines on HER face and SHE certainly is not reduced to using filler.

Miaow... yes, I can speak CAT.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 29th, 2012.

Saturday 28 January 2012

Roast Pork and Sage...

Good evening to YOU all..

Oh, MY feathers.. I trust that none of you caught a chill today? It is bitter in London and damp, therefore, most definitely, 'a two Hot Water Bottle' evening. SHE went out looking like a cross between a Russian Mujik and The Michelin Tyre person, around HER head and neck SHE had a long woollen scarf and a thick fleece was underneath a padded coat, how it fastened is beyond ME.

SHE went to The North End Road Market and put HER nose into the Butchers to thank them for the delicious Lamb, whilst SHE was there SHE saw they had a 'Special' on Shoulder of Pork on the bone, (our favourite cut of Pork), one popped straight into Wicker Trolley, then SHE saw a whole box of (22) Persimmons for £3.00! Normally, they sell at 3 for £1.00, so Wicker Trolley took those as well, HER last stop was with the lovely Carol, who sells very good vegetables. Purple Sprouting Broccoli and potatoes for mashing slid amongst the Persimmons, HER food shopping was done. Off to the Charity Shop to collect the items SHE had paid for and to come back home on the #14.

Into the kitchen with Wicker Trolley, out came the Pork, on went the gas, rub-a-dub-dub with oil, pepper and sage and into the oven went Pork to cook for a good three hours....

Tomorrow SHE goes to meet Debbie Goaty-Milk Seller... three litres please Debbie. Such glorious milk. WE feel mighty sorry for people who are unable to source a local supply of 'proper' milk. So off to the Parson's Green Farmer's Market SHE has to go in the morning, oh, I hope it doesn't snow tonight in London, up in the north they've had all sots of white stuff, hail, ice and snow.. not good for my wild feathery-faced friends who have been singing in the Gardens opposite our house.

Before I forget, I must tell Joanna that the email address that she gave us is not working properly.. she gave us joanna.darcy69@yahoo.com but norty Mr.Yahoo says that that email address doesn't exist.. it is really most peculiar.

I loved her Post about her dogs in Singapore, although I am fluent in Dog and Jack Parker aka little dog, I have never actually met one, I had a friend called Zak when I was very little, he was a big black Cat and WE used to sleep on the sofa together, I perched on the back of the sofa and Zak slept on the cushion right underneath. I am also fluent in Cat and Kitten.

Cats and Dogs age differently to Parrots, he was 162 'Cat' years and I still miss him.

It is strange how things work out, isn't it? The Charity Shop is closed for three weeks whilst they do electrical work and at The Studio WE are going to be very busy as there are a lot of very nice orders that came in this last week. We will go there instead of to the shop.

I can smell Roast Pork... yummy-yum-yum, hop-diggity-dog. Supper time, early grub, dark and cold out there, all the more reason to put warm grub into your tummies. With a quick zoom down on to HER head, off WE go to take the meat out of the oven to rest and to steam the Broccoli.

I hope that YOU've got an equally delicious yumyum planned for YOUR supper?

Toot toot to YOU all.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 28th, 2012.

The next day after Lunch.

Dear Reader, my apologies to YOU all. I know I should have written about OUR luncheon last night but it was very late when WE got home and SHE made a quick telephone call and then WE went straight to bed.

Something serious was going on in the West End of the city last night as the Police were all over the place and several of the major roads were closed, SHE considered going on the Tube, but as SHE was very tired and carrying ME, a basket + a pot of flowers, the thought of all those people rushing to go elsewhere on a Friday night was NOT a happy one and so WE just sat on the #19 bus and let it carry us home.

Lollipop was the first to arrive, (she is always on time), the doorbell rang and there she was, I am afraid to admit that WE were running behind schedule. But there was no problem, SHE said "follow me" and took her guest straight upstairs. WE were planning to give our guests drinks and nibbles downstairs but it wasn't going to happen, so through the kitchen they went into the Drawing Room and OUR party started.

JJ arrived a little late but, as he was carrying a pretty bag with beautiful pots of Paperwhites for HER and Studio Owner, he was forgiven instantly! Lollipop has already given Studio Owner a bottle of Red Wine that they found to be delicious.

Well.. What can ONE say? Except what an extraordinary lunch THAT was. It transpired that Lollipop had known Lovely Assistant's father a long time ago, so they had lots to talk about, JJ knew lots of people that Studio Owner knew, so they were off and running to the races, as it were and as neither of them are shy, there was none of that stilted conversation that you sometimes hear at parties.

SHE served MY food on a smaller plate, I had salad, I particularly like the dressing that Studio Owner makes, then, as I am a Raptor and eat meat, I had lamb and vegetables, followed by fresh berries with spiny-apples served in their shells with Rosewater.

SHE put the food onto MY plate and gave me ONE OF THOSE LOOKS, I know YOU know what sort I mean, it is the look that mothers give their children and it says "BEHAVE and don't let the side down", so I kept MY beak out of HER plate and ate what SHE had put on mine.

Oh, I forgotten how much I lurve Raspberries, SHE grows both the Red and Golden Autumn Varieties on HER allotment. If it wasn't SO bitter that is where SHE would be today, cutting down the Raspberry Canes and Asparagus Ferns, but it is freezing...

BUT WHAT is this I hear, YOU've never eaten a Golden Raspberry, well, if YOU 'curry' favour with HER, you might get invited to one of HER monthly lunches next summer and eat some of these fruits that taste like nectar.. yum.

THEY all had a marvellous time and I am pleased to report that I behaved impeccably, this is NOT a gross fib, I promise you. My only slip was to slurp out of HER coffee cup, oh Lord, how I love coffee and SHE forbids it, so it has to be done on the sly when SHE is not watching, I had managed to steal two slurps before SHE cottoned on to what I was doing, great pity that.

When I had finished eating, I dropped my back toes over the edge of the table and settled down to watch them. My dears, there wasn't a lull in the conversation once, not for a nano-second did they stop to draw breath, they ate and drank and laughed and told stories.

In fact, THEY carried on as if all of them had known each other for decades.. it is such fun to see HUMANS having a nice time and it is MUCH nicer for ME than HER going out to a restaurant, where, of course, I cannot go.

This brings us to today... We are having a very lazy morning, WE got up, ate breakfast, SHE switched on Router and the two of US got back into her cosy bed. SHE does have to go out later to collect some things from The Trinity Shop in Fulham Road, the shop is going to be closed for a week whilst the builders are renovating the electrical system, so SHE is picking up a couple of things and then coming home via the North End Road.

SHE will go to see Butcher DICKINSONS in The North End Road to say "Thank You" for that superb Leg of Lamb. And SHE will also see Carol who supplies HER with vegetables. Yes, I know SHE has an allotment but don't forget SHE had to feed lots of hungry mouths, not just US this week!

I hope that YOU have plans for a happy weekend. Don't catch a chill as it is very cold outside. Me, I plan to settle on top of OUR bedroom door and have a little snooze whilst SHE is out.


GeeGee Parrot.
January 28th, 2012.

Thursday 26 January 2012

Luncheons and Guests with strange names..

"If Spring has sprung and the Sun is 'ris, I wonder where the Birde is? Some people say the bird is on the wing, but that's absurb, the Wing is on the Bird".

Don't mind me, Dear Reader, I am jursst dotty tonight.

For tomorrow, WE are having a 'slap-up' lunch at the Studio and I will be meeting two of HER favourite people. One is a woman whom SHE calls Lollipop, yes, to her face she calls the poor woman this name. YOU must have realised by now that YOU only get given a nickname if SHE is fond of you and SHE is mighty fond of Lollipop aka Anne Beddo.

The other guest is the most enchanting old colleague of hers from days when SHE made beautiful lamps and lampshades. He is an Architect, he specialises in Georgian Architecture and is acknowledged to be, probably, the foremost expert on this subject. His name is John J. O'Connell and SHE adores him. His name is a 'no brainer', he is JJ.

She wanted Ship's Captain (aka Nicholas H. who is The Assistant Clerk at Goldsmith's Hall) to come but unfortunately, he is unable to make it, he will have to come another Friday, SHE holds these lunches on the last Friday of each month and very popular they are too. We meet at 12.45 with a glass of something delicious, sit down at 1.15 and stay there until late in the afternoon. Great deals are done and sponserships of folk and ideas are financed, none of this "I must go back to the office by 2.30 business" happens

WE eat HOME COOKED FOOD, WE don't eat any of that dreadful 'TakeAway' nonsense and very delicious it is, the subjects of conversation are extremely varied and in order to mix it all'up, the guests are a mix of clients, colleagues, family, friends, locals. WE can be six at the table or sometimes as many as 10, all having a jolly time.

It is always fun to introduce people to new people and to see friendships being formed. I certainly am looking forward to meeting Ships's Captain again, he was in the Royal Navy and his ship was HMS Lancaster, the Ships's mascot was an African Grey Parrot, he didn't think it was at all 'funny' when he walked up the stairs at the Studio and saw ME standing on HER head whilst SHE was doing some washing-up, you have to go through the galley kitchen to get to the drawing room, a room where all of the design drawing takes place, it is NOT a with-drawing room! Mind you, a lot of tea does get drunk up there....

WE have an early start tomorrow, SHE bought the leg of lamb and the vegetables today and has dropped them at the Studio, tomorrow housework has to be done and ingredients for pudding need to be purchased. I am being as quiet as a mouse but I know she knows I know that it is the dreaded 'bedtime'... how I hate those words. I have, however, decided that We do need to get up that much earlier, so I have decided to bite the bullet, fly onto her head and get the dastardly deed over and done with, this way, we can wake up sooner..

So I bid YOU all a very good night, I hope that Joanna get that norty bug out of her computer system.. norty bug, it told us all that she was in London with NO money, as if J-J would ever let that happen to her, very silly scamming bug.

WE get to see Debbie goat on Sunday.. bleat bleat... at Parson's Green Farmer's Market... bleat bleat, FRESH Goaty Milk keeps Mr. Woe out of our house!

Sleep well.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 26th, 2012.

Tuesday 24 January 2012

Hairy Folk with 'tall-stand-up-ears'.

Now the Tale I am going to tell happened loooonng ago but Dagga Parrot-Spirit-in-the-Sky assures me it is true because HE knew Constance and has met the other hairy folk concerned and they assured him that it is.

A very loooonng time ago, SHE and HER Human family lived near Tenterden in Kent. They lived in an old house - back end Tudor, front end late Georgian - on farm. The family had full compliment of animals that you would normally associate with living on farm, James the Cat, Mouser and Rater extraordinaire, Bhalo (pronounced Barloo) Black Labrador who was Hugo's gun dog, Ricky Alsatian who was Constance's shadow, Bluey Pony who came to stay for 9 months and Victoria Goat, a British Sanaan, she was HER Goat.

One day Constance drove down from the garage / shed and called to the dogs to come and get into the van, Bhalo and Ricky appeared, most eager to jump into the back of the little van but who was this, bouncing along with them? Why, none other than Victoria, "the more the merrier" cried Constance and making sure that they were all safely shut in, SHE jumped in beside HER mother and off down the front farm drive they rattled and turned right onto the Tenterden Road.

The road took them into the 'bottom' of Tenterden's High Street and there is a junction at which you have to stop.

Tenterden is, alas and slack, on the Tourist Map of Kent and that day was no exception, for standing at the junction dressed in hideously touristic dress stood a family of 'Grockels', mother Grockle, father Grockle, boy Grockle and baby Grockle in a push chair. NOW, you may never have heard that (very) Kentish expression for a tourist before but I KNOW YOU KNOW what I mean... they are hideous .. and indeed, very Grockley.

Remember the 3 animals in the back section of the van, well, the van was waiting at the lights for the Rolvenden traffic to go up the High Street and Victoria Goat lifted up her head, tall ears and long nose, boy Grockle goes in a very nasal Grockley accent "Dad, dad, there's a Goat in the back of that van", Victoria put her head down and Ricky Alsatian lifted his up, tall ears and long nose, father Grockle hits boy Grockle HARD on head and says "Stupid boy, it's an Alsatian, innit?"

Constance, whose whistle was legendary and who had heard this poor child being made to look foolish, gave one of her best-ever Wolf whistles with which all three animals raised their heads and she shouted "No, she's a Goat", let in the clutch and drove up the street.

Grockle family left standing on the junction to await another change of the traffic lights.

People wonder why MY HER is 'different'? I think, of course, that is quite correct that Victoria should have gone shopping, after all, I go with HER to The Studio on the #19 bus.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 24th, 2012.

Monday 23 January 2012

THEY have been out-and-about.

SHE and Debi, from Sheffield who came to visit us, have been out and about all over town. On Sunday THEY went to take poor, very sick iPad to the Apple Store on Covent Garden.

And they came home with NEW iPad, really new, fresh out of box iPad as SHE, aka SWSBO, said that as it wasn't HER fault the norty iCloud took all her stuff away, SHE was NOT going to accept a reconditioned one.

Dear Reader, they looked at her, SHE smiled very sweetly at them and they suddenly thought better about trying to enforce their company's policy as it wasn't going down too well with SWSBO...it means She Who Should Be Obeyed and usually refers to ME..

THEY've been hard at it ever since feeding their electrical pads with information, books, music, you name it, the iPads have been force fed it!

Thank goodness, though, THEY do like to eat and food has been eaten, they have been jaunting to such places as The Ridley Road Market in Islington, Broadway Market in Hackney and Streatham Hill...

At long last they came back last night and, finally, supper came, it was cold roast lamb with rice and beans, I love lamb and rice and beans, for pudding SHE had a deliciously ripe Persimmon, Debi is not a fruit eating human.. Thank goodness SHE lurves fruit as much as I do.

Debi deep cleaned the HP desktop, it took 2 hours to start up in Friday, so Debi got into HP's stomach and threw everything out, adjusted a couple of things, left it to download some stuff from Windows. They went out of the flat, came back, did more work on it and they went to bed, in the morning on Saturday, the desktop started and loaded just-like-that... Whoosh, it went!

So now everything behaves like it should do... But poor Miz Sony Vaio, she will have to go to see The Wizard as it appears every time the wireless switch is put on, the laptop crashes!

SHE has been talking lots to Debi, for Debi is going back to America when she has sold the house in Sheffield. And she is going to have Goaty Folk.. So Debi will have to talk with other Debbie who has several hundred Goaty Folks in Kent and who knows how to make Goaty Cheese.

And talking of Goaty Folk, guess WHOM SHE has found a photo of.... Why, none other than.... Miss Victoria Goat.

There is a wonderfully silly tale of Victoria the British Sanaan Goat, Balu the black Labrador, Ricky the Alsatian, Constance Human and HER, it happened in about 1961, loooong before I was born but it is funny and it will show you how mad SHE and HER mother are / were!

I will tell you that tale tomorrow, for tonight I am very tired, WE have all stayed up much TOO late every night, last night I was allowed to stay up even later but I got too above myself and got over excited and nipped dear Debi, it was because she closed her Laptop whilst I was watching a Pink Pig dancing and singing on U-tube... oh dear, the shame of it, SHE put ME to bed with no kiss on my snitch...

So I made a BIG fuss of her when I got up this am... but now I am just too tired, much too much to tell you about today, I will tell it all to YOU tomorrow.. whoops, nearly forgot my manners, I have to say "thank you" to BiBi dearest... sleep well Dear Reader, good night.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 23rd, 2012.

Wednesday 18 January 2012

CELEBRATION TIME... Crack open that barrel of Rum!

Shiver your timbers my hearties, walk the plank, sunken treasure, golden doubloons...

It is quite alright Dear Reader, I haven't been captured by a Man of War and tied to The Crow's Nest, but I am a Parrot, and as such, MUST have had an ancestor who Sailed The Spanish Main....

No, I am simply expressing my happiness and joy... For HER Professor at the hospital said 'the magic phrase' to HER this afternoon and the magic phrase was.....

Drum roll please......

"Sara, I am very happy to say that I discharging you, ALL of your last tests came back clear".

SHE doesn't have anything nasty, she does have something curious but it ain't 'nasty' like the big nasties which are bowel or colon cancer. SHE'll be around for a longgggg time and WE will play Pirates and drive YOU all mad with OUR antics and silly stuff....

SHE didn't tell anyone SHE was going to get the test results today but SHE deliberately invited Debi down to stay this week. As today SHE was going to have sad news or happy news, either way, Debs was the one SHE wanted to have here .. To help HER get ready to accept and deal with 'IT' OR she is absolutely guaranteed to be the one WE WILL BE very foolish with!

Pieces of Eight Jim Lad... Ship ahoy, Run up the Flag boy.. So go sit in the Bosun's Chair and tell the happy news..

"MY MAMA's OK".... Now excuse / pardon ME but I'm a bit 'wet eyed' so I'll leave you now.

My very best wishes to all.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 18th, 2012.

Monday 16 January 2012

Don't trust Clouds.. they'll rain on your 'parade'...

In more ways than one, dear Reader.

SHE had booked herself a lesson at Apple with her iPad this evening, so SHE gave me MY high-tea and went to the Apple Store in Covent Garden. Having left in plenty of time, SHE got there, found herself a seat, set up iPad and along came 2 instructors at 7pm.

They taught HER how to do things and then SHE said "this is a really silly thing but MY whoosh has gone missing".. The machine no longer goes whoosh when I send an email", they went into settings and checked it was there, they turned the sound up and asked her to send an email. HER WHOOSH didn't WHOOSH.

So the senior instructor went into Cloud and said "ok, I am going to back everything up onto Cloud and restore your iPad. He did this and it failed.. Dear Reader, oh dear, oh dearie me. One very embarrassed Senior Apple Instructor with a MAJOR systems failure on his hands.

Off they went to Genius Bar and came back after 10 minutes with very apologetic faces saying "we are very, very sorry but there is a major fault in this iPad and we are going to give you a new one. Please book yourself into the Genius Bar as soon as you can and then we will give you a brand new machine and set it up for you and test it to make sure that Cloud is backing everything up". So do not fret Dear Reader, there will be no break in YOUR Daily Read of MY Blog.

All HER photos have disappeared, that flipping Cloud just gobbled them all'up. Luckily for Apple, the majority of the photos came off the big Canon Camera, and that, SHE is praying, still has all of her photos still on the Memory Chip. But others, well, have gone into thin air, as it were.

"Type about HAPPIER things", I shout to HER.. Like Debi coming to staying on Thursday.. WE haven't seen Miz Debi in oh, such a long time, it really is for ages, in fact, it must be nearly 30 months.

Such a lot has happened to Debi and Yowie Cat and Little Miss in this time, that I don't really know where to start. They used to live in a charming cobbled street in Deptford - where Peter The Great learnt the trade of Ship Building - and we used to see Debi whenever WE went to a workshop there.

After doing whatever had to done or discussed at the workshop, WE would go and find Debi and then eat delicious yumyum in one of the market restaurants, then MY two Gurls used to go to an excellent woman who would take whisk their whiskers away. Occasionally, they would jaunt even further afield to Lewisham or Catford, where there is an amazing Nursery Garden called Phoebe's, this was where SHE found wonderful Espaliered White Cherry trees for a fraction of the price quoted by HER usual fruit tree suppliers.

Debi's mother in law became very ill and Debi moved up to Sheffield to take care of her. Then mother in law died and Debi and her husband decided to stay up to Sheffield. Things went very wrong, Debi's husband died nearly a year ago and now Debi, who is an American, is selling the house in Yorkshire and moving back to America, where she has three sons, several grandchildren, a brother and his family and a lot of friends.

With the proceeds of the sale of the house here in England, she will be able to buy a place for herself to live in, another place to rent out for income plus some land for chickens, goats and pigs. It all makes very good sense.. Except WE will miss her, knowing that she is no longer just a train ride away will be very sad.. "Write of MORE happier things", I yell at her.

More Happier things.. Well, OUR local Butcher, Dickensons, in The North End Road has delicious meat because they are proper butchers. None of that disgusting pre-packed stuff is sold here. SHE has been going to this butcher since 1967, yes Dear Reader, the same year SHE came to live in London.

Wonderful, properly prepared meat. Hung for the right length of time. Great free range eggs and lovely, lovely staff. There is always a queue in which there are always every nationality waiting to be served and the service IS first rate. The prices are reasonable, what more could or would you ask for? Debi let slip that she loves Calves Liver.. Yumyum, so do WE, so SHE will get some for when Debi's here. I can taste it now. Oh, lick my beak time, for it is so good.

Tomorrow being Tuesday, SHE goes to the Studio, Wizard has said he will be there to fix some taps and that he is bringing back Acer who almost died last year, Wizard found that a board had burnt out, he's fitted a new one and so SHE is taking the desktop to be mended as well because it won't download iTunes or behave properly, so Wizard is going to have a look at Compac PLUS, the very, very norty, Miss Sony Vaio who just stopped one day.. She went black and never restarted, Miss Sony Vaio had been fine the day before... Very curious folk Japanese.

Lots of work for Wizard...

So.. We are going to bed now, it has been an the-top-too-over-exciting day. She'll tell you about the broken valve and gushing water tomorrow but now SHE is very tired so it is time for ME to stop and for US to wish YOU all a very "goodnight". Most of you will read this when you wake up in the morning but please know that WE wish you happy dreams and for many Angels to watch over you when YOU do go to sleep.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 16th, 2012.

Other People's Voices.

When the sky is grey and WE are blue, what are GURLS supposed to do?

For a start... laughter is very good for you, it exercises lots of muscles and YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY "use it.. or lose it".. I do so think it is a great pity that a lot of these celebrities don't realise this.

AND MY DEARS...

HAVE YOU seen a recent photo of the Italian woman who is married to the little 'big' man of France recently? Goodness gracious me, WHAT has she done to herself? From having 'quite an interesting face', she now looks not unlike one of those small furry creatures that I meet when I go MY Aviary, aka the pet shop, you know what I mean, the breed of animal that store their grub in their chops but this one that has just had a very nasty fright!

She doesn't look anything like she used to, it is a very good thing her baby is not old enough to remember what she looked before or it would be very confused.

Other people's voices is the title of this post and I need to explain to most of YOU about MY 'other voices'. You have already read about Mysterious Man but have yet to hear about Cat, Chicken, BIG Dog, Duck, little Jack Parker, Ansa-phone, landline, multiple Mobiles.

SHE forbids ME to learn Dyson.. I wonder why?

Let's start with Little Jack Parker... He is a miniature Dachshund who lives about ten houses away up our street. His Human, whose name I don't know, has a friend who lives in the house next door to us and Human used to stand and chat to his friend, little Jack Parker would only stand still for about five minutes before he started to yap.. sorry Jack, I do know what a bark sounds like and you don't make that sound... So "yap, yap, yap", draw breath " yap, yap, yap" went on most days.

So what is a Parrot to do? Mimic the yap, of course, nothing else to do when SHE is out and about and ONE has stupidly shredded today's paper before reading it Not a clever thing to do.

She was most curious as to how and where I had heard this (very) annoying noise and learnt it without being introduced to a yappy dog. Then ONE day, SHE was walking down our street and from behind HER came "yap, yap, yap" in exactly the same tone and cadence as 'MY' "yap" that I so annoyed HER with. SHE turned around and there, bustling along towards HER on the pavement with Dog Human on his lead, was a very smart, highly polished Black & Tan minature Dachshund.

SHE said to the dog "ok, Little Dog, and where do YOU live and how come GeeGee speaks like you"? Dog Human on the lead said "what do you mean", so SHE had to explain that HER GeeGee Parrot spoke in the voice of his dog... Dog Human on lead laughed and said "we have a friend who lives next door to you and if I spend more than a very short time talking, Jack Parker, for that is HIS name, begins to yap".

So, the mystery of Little Jack Parker's voice was solved!

The other noises... Well, how do YOU think I have learnt them? Telephone Voices & Ansa-phone are a NO Brainer, but the first person who sends the RIGHT answer into The Comment Box with the solution to all the other voices that I can speak, will win A RED TAIL FEATHER....

I hope you'll all put YOUR thinking caps on and enter into this amusing bit of nonsense!

You HAVE to laugh and smile for laughing and smiling means that YOU excercise those facial muscles keeping them fit and toned and fit and toned muscles hold everything UP!

GeeGeeParrot.
January 16th, 2012.

Sunday 15 January 2012

The Tale of Christmas Day and The Funky Chicken Dance.

It was early when I awoke that Christmas morn. I had woken early because I had to get MY present to HER absolutely right. It was 2006 and I didn't get pocket money in those days, so I hadn't been able to purchase a present but I knew that I had to give HER something special.

SHE loves to laugh and sing but I couldn't write music for a song, so I scratched my beak and came up with something that would, I hoped, amuse HER and make HER laugh.

Taking a deep breath, I began with "perkcherch, perkch" and began to move on my perch. SHE was fast asleep, after all it was only 07.00am but I had to wake HER up with MY present "perchurip, perkcherkkk" louder and louder, over and over I called to HER.

Suddenly, my cover rolled back and there SHE was, looking, I must say, mighty mystified! It was time to 'give' HER MY Christmas present And I sprang into motion with the words "Perkcherk, cherkkk, chirp, chirp, perk chirp" and I strutted my stuff up and down my perch, wiggling my tail and flapping my wings.

YOU see, Dear Reader, if YOU don't have beans or any other currency with which to buy presents and you can't write music, you have to make YOUR Beloved laugh.

SHE laughed as I gave HER MY version of The Funky Chicken Dance on Christmas Day.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 15th, 2012.

The Tale of the Disappearing Walnuts.

Yes, Dear Reader, this post is about thievery. Aka: Nut Rustling.

SHE, as YOU know if YOU are up to date with MY Blog, went to Balham yesterday.

SHE disappeared down a hole in the ground into something called 'The Tube' and popped up, rather like a rabbit, in south London,and there was a sign to The Farmer's Market.

SHE met up with Ellie who sells the delicious FRESH Goaty Milk and received, with pleasure, a gift for ME. I didn't go because it was SO cold but I had sent HER off with one of MY very famous RED feathers, this was a token of my gratitude for getting rid of Mister Woe.

I gather that if someone receives a White Feathers it means or signifies Cowardice. Well, if YOU are lucky to receive one of MY RED feathers, it means that YOU are OK in MY 'book'.

I digress and must get back to 'the Nut Rustling'.

Now, this is where it all gets a bit convoluted (?). SHE didn't open the box then and there because it said "for GeeGee Parrot, Happy Saturday, from all of the Goats".

SHE brought it home and told ME that SHE had the box. Then, rather naughtily, at some point yesterday, SHE opened it, saw what was in it and wrote to Ellie to say "thank you for the delicious Walnuts".

This has 'ticked me off' considerably. First of all, it was MY box, I should have been the one to open it, I am very good at opening things with my beaky beak and NOW, MY box has disappeared, it has just vanished from sight.

Walnuts... fresh Walnuts, this means that Ellie and David must have a Walnut Tree at the farm.

I know that WE share a lot of things, SHE has been known to have a quick lick of the spoon when SHE gives ME MY Humous and Pink Stuff and really 'What is HERS is MINE and what is MINE is MINE also' but to thieve, from right underneath MY beak, Ellie's gift to ME, is very naughty.

I want YOU to write in MY comments box and tell HER that SHE has to give them back to ME.

Also, I gather that Granny and Astrologer Extraordinaire Leigh both wrote to HER this morning expressing their sadness and shock at MY accident with the door and breaking MY tail.. Why didn't they write to ME? I am the ONE who had THE accident and am missing feathers in action.

Now.. Where would YOU put a box of Walnuts? I hope that SHE intends to go out at some time today, at the moment SHE is still lolling about as if SHE was on Daddy's Yacht..

GeeGee Parrot.
January 15th, 2012.

Saturday 14 January 2012

An Instrument Rated Pilot I am not.

Oh dear, I had a crash and bust MY tail up... I am now minus 4 of MY red feathers.

It was very early on Thursday morning and SHE had gone down to the bathroom without switching on the hall lights. I took off from the sittingroom door, thinking that there was enough light to make the manoeuvre into the bathroom, do a small circuit and land on top of the door...

I misjudged it extremely badly, hit the hall side of the door and crashed onto the floor. Tail damaged, four, yes four, feathers loosened which then dropped from MY fuselage. The shame of it, luckily all that was really hurt was MY pride, I made sure to jump right up and do a take off and landing before MY nerves were damaged.

SHE picked up the feathers and put them into a jar, not a word was said, SHE can be very diplomatic sometimes. I know SHE was thinking of doing some work at home today, but instead, SHE went out and that meant that I was able to be quiet at home and able to 'lick my wounds' as it were and think about that hideous flight that went SO wrong.

It is a great pity that Pilot isn't around, he flew jets and landed on AirCraft Carriers, he had both Instrument Rating as well as Visual Rating for flying and he would certainly be able to give ME one or two pointers.

Now SHE is home and is downloading the iTunes software onto HER desktop, then SHE'll be able to move some more photos onto iPad. She did the ones of Marie Teresa and Zaira when SHE was in the Apple Store in Covent Garden, oh, I had completely forgotten about those charming Italian women.

WE ALL had a great deal of fun whilst they were here. Zaira came all the way from Roma especially to meet me, she LURVES African Grey Parrots and actually, by the time I had finished clambering all over Marie Teresa, she was pretty fond of me too!

WE will write about them and post the photos.. It all started because Zaira asked if I would be permitted to join them for breakfast... One of MY favourite meals is breakfast, just the name alone is pretty good if you think about it! Lord knows how I hate to 'fast', so breaking it every day makes perfect sense to ME.

SHE received an email saying that there was going to be some fresh Kid meat at The Farmer's Market on Saturday at Balham, SHE bought a pack and now WE must look for a good recipe as Kid meat is wonderful. Ellie suggested some Apricots.. What a good idea that sounds.

But tonight SHE cooked shoulder of Pork with the bone in.. A big treat for the weekend, with Brussel Sprout tops and some Purple Sprouting Brocolli. I had some of the meat and vegetables, followed by two slices go Persimmon. I'll sleep well tonight with a full tummy, that's for sure, WE will both sleep well.. And WE hope you will too.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 14th, 2012.

Friday 13 January 2012

A Kissing Tax.. That should stop it!

When did the French start exporting Kisses?

Now, of course, I really should check the facts with Joanna because she is married to a Frenchman and she will know the answer to this question but from what I know, which is not a lot, don't the French do it this way? They kiss family and friends.. and certainly NOT people who they have met only twice, and absolutely NOT people who are OLDER than them.

SHE was kissed this week by someone SHE finds quite repulsive, for more than one reason, no, my beak is sealed.. When SHE saw this person advancing upon HER, SHE did NOT smile or give this person any possibility of thinking that SHE was pleased to see this person.

However, the person, who was drunk, took no notice and made as to clasp HER to their chest as if to imply that SHE was a long lost friend...

Ugh, why do people behave like this, it is SO unattractive. I blame those naughty French for exporting, FOR FREE, their kissing habit? If they had put a high tarif on kisses or taught people the Rules on The Art of Kissing, then these awful people would not do it, IF you are going to kiss someone.. Please don't make the mistake of kissing someone you shouldn't and certainly you do NOT kiss someone who shows every sign that they do not want to be kissed.

On a much lighter and happier note...

WE were at the Studio today and MY cage was taken UP those stairs that I have written about. It was much nicer to be up here rather than down there. SHE positioned MY cage within sight and just a flap away from the kitchen and, shame upon me, I didn't even notice when SHE went out because I had, within my beady sight, both Lovely Assistant and Studio Owner and I was able to see what they were doing. Much more interesting than being downstairs by MYSELF.

SHE ran around and out and about like some demented person, up Red Lion Street, down Clerkenwell Road, along to Britton Street, up Saffron Hill, along Kirby Street, back again, then across to Lambs Conduit Street, through Brunswick Square to Waitrose, back through Brunswick, (are you still with ME?) and finally, back across Theobalds Road and down Red Lion Street and into the Studio. HER legs are going to be in mighty good condition for digging the allotment, that's for sure!

But tomorrow.. YES, ahha.. That horrid and very dismal Mister Woe better have his bag packed and ready to go out into the COLD.... for WE are going on a train to Balham.. chufchufchufff.. toot toot. Yes, WE are going to rendezvous with Ellie of Ellie's Dairy, to purchase GOATY MILK. Yes, fresh Goaty Milk will, again, be in the fridge. Oh, happy days will be here again. Thank God for that, as HER in the morning without a proper cup of coffee is... Well... perhaps the comment I was about to say is best left unsaid.

WE are going to put our lights out early tonight, for it was no gross fib, SHE really DID run about a lot today, don't forget HER age, and WE do have a reasonably early start as neither of US have been to this place in Balham. So from the two of US, it is "Good Night to you all".

GeeGee Parrot.
January 13th 2012.

Wednesday 11 January 2012

Raclette and Cheerful Folk

Are good ingredients for a successful party. It was Studio Owner's birthday party last night and it was a success!

I hope Studio Owner liked MY present, it was a small stone head of a Falcon depicting the Egyptian God Horus. I thought it about time she had a BIRD of her own to keep her company and give her protection whilst I am not in the Studio.

Neither of my two chums (both of whom have had African Grey Parrots) were there but Mark was, WE met Mark just before Christmas. WE sat together at the table, the 3 of us, HER, Mark and I and THEY ate Raclette and it was very nice because Mark gave ME some of his Potato.

No, I didn't bully him, he was kind enough to offer it to ME.

The Raclette Grilling was done by a very dear person, she is an old friend of Studio Owner. Susannah had actually gone to the trouble of bringing the Grill Machine up from the country up to London and bought an enormous chunk of Raclette Cheese. She served it the correct way, like they do in Savoy / Switzerland, with boiled potatoes and Gerkins and very tasty it was, too!

There were two pretty women there who Ooohed and Ahmed over me, you will be happy to know that I was safely perched on HER head, out of anyone's way and keeping my beak to myself, as it were! You have heard what happens if people want to stroke me.. It is better not to as 'small nip' might just occur, not out of malice, I get jursttttt too excited. Sure enough, they had both had contact with African Grey Parrots in their childhoods.

Then WE spoke to a charming man who used to be in Theatre Design who spoke about working with animals and birds in the theatre, rather remiss of US as WE didn't catch his name but he is now a Jeweller.. This is a very proper trade with demanding skills and an intensive training, if you want to be a good one!

It was getting late, so SHE washed up the plates and it was time to slide out quietly, SHE said "farewell" to Lovely Assistant and asked HIM to say "thank you" to dear Studio Owner who was deep in conversation wirh friends, WE said "goodbye and good night" to Jeffrey and Mark and WE slipped down the stairs to collect HER coat, wicker trolley, pop ME into my basket and to catch our bus home.

Home, quick lick of Homous, a drink of water, a "goodnight" kiss on my beak and into my bed / cage. I was asleep with MY beak between my wing blades in a matter of minutes.

What a happy time. I like parties.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 11th, 2012.

Monday 9 January 2012

Crisis... Goat Milk Crisis.. None in the fridge!

Quick Post.. Oh dear, oh dear.

Thank goodness WE had a very happy day today, because WE came home from Studio and found that Mister Woe has moved into the house... to be precise he is in the kitchen but his being anywhere in THIS house is NOT at all good or happy making. And do you know HOW Mister Woe got into OUR home? It was HER fault, nothing, thank goodness to do with ME.

SHE grossly miscalculated the amount of pints SHE should have bought from Ellie, the Goaty Milk lady the last time they met at Parsons Green Farmer's Market. SHE only took 8 pints when she should have taken 12, you will all say "why so many pints", it was because of the Christmas Holidays & New Year's Day.

So Mister Woe is in residence until Saturday, when, thank goodness Ellie will bring Ellie's Dairy to town and will be at Balham with her fabulous FRESH Goat's milk and cheese...

HER coffee and cereal in the morning is not the same without FRESH, untreated Goaty MIlk. Do NOT suggest that SHE goes to a supermarket and buy that pasteurised stuff, if you have had Ellie's milk, then you will never go back to drink pasturised stuff ever again. It is grim.

SO Balham, here WE come on Saturday, I am going too and will meet Ellie. Yippee. Then our breakfast time will be happy again. It is a just a wee bit gruesome at the moment sharing the kitchen with Mister Woe.

SHE is very spoilt, all of Ellie's customers are. Just like her charming Goaty Folk. WE hope that Ellie's kid gets better soon, poor baby goat.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 9th, 2012.

Sunday 8 January 2012

Busy.. Back to Studio..

Dear Reader..

YOU must be very confused by the amount of the Posts that I have posted today, the reason is that tomorrow is January 9th and WE all go back to work at The Studio.

Yeah, I get to see my beloved Studio Owner and my equally beloved Lovely Assistant. And the gossip is that HE will be changing HIS name to Lovely Apprentice... Watch this space.

On Tuesday it is Studio Owners birthday and she is having a party and I am invited!

So tomorrow, SHE is taking HER high powered water jet water cleaner to do the cobbles and concrete outside and help Studio Owner get the Studio and the yard outside ready for the party on Tuesday.

Parties... I LURVE PARTIES. I get to ride around on HER head and generally have a marvellous time, hopefully a couple of MY friends will be there, that would be good to have a cuddle with them and to wish them a VERY Happy, Healthy and Prosperous New Year. Talking of New Years, the Year of The Dragon is the Chinese New Year which starts in February, I must ask HER to find out what Chinese sign I am, SHE is a Metal Tiger.

But with all the excitement of THE party and starting work again after such a long break, SHE may not have time to type out MY Blog... That is why I have given YOU, Dear Reader, a bit extra to keep you reading until I am able to get HER to sit down again which, more than likely, will not be until Thursday.

Like MacArthur said "I shall return".

GeeGee Parrot.
January 8th, 2012.

Beginning The 'Begin The Beguine' Tale.

Have you noticed something Dear Reader, the Tales I tell are, of course, mostly about me and I yes, I know that it is MY Blog.

However today, SHE was going to do some ironing and SHE muttered something and, for an instance, I thought SHE was quoting Shakespeare but I soon realised what SHE had been saying was "oh Gloria, Gloria, wherefore art thou Gloria?", in the meantime I was SO excited to see Ironing Board and Iron come out of their cupboard-house that I did a few limbering-up movements ready for MY Salsa dancing on top of the door. See previous Post to get up to speed if you are unaware of who Gloria is / was.

But, what was this.... A tune I had never heard before. BUT, ONE SHE obviously knew well as SHE had a mysterious, 'wet-eyed' / sentimental look on HER face. The name of the song was 'Begin The Beguine'.

NO, SHE is not THAT old, it wasn't the original that Constance and Hugo would have smooched to on a dance floor somewhere East of Suez. It was the Spanish version sung by Julio Iglesias. If you don't know who Constance and Hugo are / were, go back and read Tales from Malaya, that will fill you in.

When SHE was getting more water for Iron, I hopped down to look at the recording date. Goodness me, he recorded it in 1981. I know SHE is very zipped up about HER 'FRIENDS' but it struck me that the one SHE had had at this time, whose name I have yet to extract from HER, must have danced with HER.

Now WHOM could I ask? Charlotte is of absolutely NO use, she wouldn't tell YOU your own name if she thought it was not your business.

Getting information out of HER sometimes is like a extracting a rabbit from a hole when it knows there are ferrets about! NOT EASY, in fact, SHE has been known to get a 'mulish' look in her eye and to clam up tighter than a Razor Clam. Equally, to MY astonishment sometimes, SHE will unlock that extraordinary memory of HER'S and SHE'll sing like the proverbial Canary, telling YOU who did what and to whom and when and where.

But, come to think about it, the information isn't ever about HER and any significant other.

I hopped back onto the top of sitting room door and thought about whom it might have been. Whomever it was, SHE obviously has extremely happy memories for otherwise SHE wouldn't still have the recording.

It is certainly a Tale that has to be expanded at another date, wait a minute, the same music is playing and SHE's singing along, SHE knows the words, this is now very serious, please, Dagga-the-Parrot-in-the-Sky I need help.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 8th, 2012.

Farewell, Adieu, Auf Wiedersein, Goodbye...

Yes, Dear Reader, this is one of the tunes from 'The Sound of Music'.. And also one of MY favourite things to whistle. It is so simple, the tune can just go on going round and around. Hum it and you will see what I mean.

Many years ago, when I was a baby Parrot, someone was staying with us and she was very grumpy. WE couldn't figure out why but oh dear, she was in a bad mood, ugh...

SHE remarked upon this to LuLu, who was living in London at the time, now that's a gurl who isn't backwards in coming forwards and upon hearing about the grumpy guest, LuLu immediately whistled "Farewell etc....".

How it made HER laugh and when SHE got home, SHE sat ME on GoosieHead in the kitchen and taught ME the tune! Such fun to have a secret to make ONE laugh and WE did.. I whistled it and SHE laughed, oh, Lord, how SHE laughed.

That was a long time ago but if I wish to cheer HER or even sometimes, MYSELF up, I whistle just the first couple of bars and WE both giggle and think how very lucky WE are that WE don't have THE dreaded GRUMPY bone in OUR bodies.

"Farewell, Adieu, Auf Wiedersein, Goodbye....... Farewell.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 8th, 2012.

An English Duke, the Georgian Prince, an American and a Pilot at The Red Socks Party

I don't need to tell you that SHE loves all kinds of birds, including, I regret to say Feral Doves... aka London Pigeons.

This Tale will take you back to how HER Friendship (for it truly is such a thing) with several of these birds began.

On the 7th of March, 1990, SHE walked up her stairs to find a big pigeon trying to kill a much smaller one who was squeaking in fear. SHE knocked the big one off the baby's back, scooped it up and took it back into the flat.

SHE had Dagga-the-Parrot in the flat, so SHE shut the baby in the bathroom and went to get the antisptic, mite powder that you always keep if you have keep birds, it kills all possible types of bugs but is harmless to birds and humans, with it SHE went back into the bathroom and examined the baby Pigeon.

It had several bites on his back and a few feathers were broken but the most surprising thing was that HE had NO tail.

HE had probably been born in a nest on top of OUR house and one day, mother Pigeon had thought it was a fine day for his first flying lesson. All well and good but mother Pigeon had not examined the rudder on her little baby flying machine and so when she jumped off the roof expecting him to follow her, he did but having no tail, meant he had plummeted to the ground.

SHE gave him a warm bath with special bird shampoo, blew him dry with the hair dryer on cool and dusted him off with the antiseptic mite powder. He loved the fuss being made of him, SHE collected a small amount of bird seed and a shallow dish of water and put him to settle down in the bath on an old towel.

Meanwhile, this time Dagga-the-Parrot was most suspicious of the noises coming from behind the closed bathroom door, why was the door closed? WE don't 'close' doors very often in this house, what was going on in there?

SHE came out and told him about this POOR bird SHE had found, what could SHE have done differently? SHE also, rather sneakily, reminded D-the-P that HE had been a 'Rescue case' and went off to make tea.

Without a tail you cannot fly and Peter Pigeon, for this was his new name, did not appear to be growing a tail, which was curious. Otherwise, his plumage was Classic London Pigeon, he was pale to dark grey, with irridescent feathers around his neck and a Corporal's 2 stripes on his wings. A beautiful bird with a bare bum.

One day SHE was going down the hall following Peter Pigeon, when suddenly, his head whipped round, he seized something with his beak and threw it on the floor, then proceeded on towards the bathroom. She stopped and picked up the discard object and realised it was a feather that has yet to have the shaft removed. The answer to the 'bare bottom mystery' was that Peter Pigeon had been pulling his tail feathers out as fast as they were trying to grow!

A small amount of Olive Oil and a little gentle scratch every day stopped the plucking and before too long, HE was strutting about with the proper amount of feathers and a very glossy back end!

SHE didn't really think about the flying too much, he had not got his tail until HE was well over 18 months old and SHE knew that without a tail HE would not have survived in the wild (aka deepest Knightsbridge) and SHE accepted the fact that SHE, because of HER action of bringing him into HER home meant that SHE was now responsible for the length of his life time.

HE 'knew' that his wings were for something but he wasn't quite sure what! He would sometimes flap them in a rather disorganised fashion and get lift off of MAYBE 3 inches off the ground, but then HE would get either bored or tired, stop and thump back to earth again. So his mode of transport was that HE strutted or ran at high speed to wherever he wanted to go.

Late 1996, a charming man re-appeared in her life, we'll call him Pilot and after a few months, SHE thought that a supper party at home would be a easy way to introduce him to few of HER friend all at the same time.. Pilot would either crash or fly, as it were!

Now Dagga-the-Parrot's anniversary was May 9th, too far away, but Peter Pigeon's was much nearer as it was the 7th of March, perfect. So SHE sent out invitations for 'Peter's Birthday Party' the dress was casual but with ONE exception, the men were to wear RED socks.

All of the invitations were accepted, Pilot wrote to say that he would certainly be coming but that he would not be able to arrive until 9pm as he was flying a plane back from France that afternoon and he would be settling papers with the Customs at Bournemouth Airport BUT that he would certainly wear RED socks.. He did not inquire who Peter was.

Everyone arrived, supper was served, there were more people than could sit around our small dining table so people were sitting on the sofa and arm chairs, the wine was flowing, the Pilot arrived punctually at 9pm in RED socks, He was introduced to everyone but then said to HER, "why did you ask me to wear these" and he pulled up his trouser leg, whereupon Prince Charles Tchkotoua, a Georgian Prince, Murray Beauclerk, aka The Duke of St.Albans and Tom Tolar, a charming American, all pulled up their trouser legs and said "we are ALL wearing them Pilot" And with that, Helena, Princess Tchkotoua laughed and went out of the room, she came back in holding Peter, HE adored Helena, and she said "this party is not only being held for you to meet all of us Pilot, it is, actually, Peter's Birthday and HE wears RED socks all the time".

It is a good sight when 4 'grown-up' men start to laugh.. A English Duke, a Georgian Prince, a charming American and a Pilot.

They laughed until the tears ran down their faces, watched by their women who smiled and the Pigeon who never flew.


GeeGeeParrot.
January 7th, 2012.

Friday 6 January 2012

Nothing is free.. Not even a kiss!

Why... Did you think kisses came free?

No, for a kiss can be very expensive but SHE says the best payment for a kiss is a smile.

If someone gives you a seat on a bus, you pay them in gratitude by saying "thank you".

You want a Flawless, 3 carat, Brilliant cut Diamond, you pay the Diamond Dealer in money.
Oh dear, no, you DIDN'T pay Retail, did you? Oooh, that's a shame.

"Thank you" is a small gesture but the non saying or neglecting to send a "thank you" card can have quite a dramatic effect. Dear Reader those who don't say it get known for their bad manners and get left off lists, all sorts of lists!

As in the following Tale.

SHE decided that HER Christmas gifts last year to her family (note the small her) and to a couple of friends, were going to be rolls of individually printed Ribbons.

For the family members and the daughter of old friends, SHE chose the colours of the ribbon and the printing. and everyone's ribbons were posted on the same day a very long time BEFORE Christmas.

BiBi dearest's postman obviously delivers to her house very early, as she almost woke HER up the very next day with her "thank you" call (FULL marks BiBi), The friend's daughter took 2 weeks to send a short email saying "she was SO busy that she had had absolutely NO time to email before"... Zoe, one of the nieces and HER God-Daughter took 3 weeks to send a "thank you" card, Charlotte sent a "thank you" letter upon her return from Scotland.

Now, what is interesting is what the lack of manners has set into action... nothing that any of them will ever be privy to... But all interesting.

Email is, in HER opinion, NOT a good or polite enough medium in which to say "thank you" for a present.

SHE thinks it is ok for an informal occasion and maybe just ok if you live in the middle of the boondocks and you are so dis-organised that you don't have a book of 2nd Class stamps at home, then maybe an email is acceptable but presumably THEY sent presents so why not a card to say something pleasant to someone who had made the effort, has thought about them and what might / would be amusing / useful to receive as a gift with which to finish wrapping THEIR children's gifts.

SHE does admit that something (email) IS better than nothing but I've noticed that Gift List for 2012 is 3 names shorter. And I tell you that I make quite sure, when SHE has taken the trouble to give or make ME something extra delicious to eat, I go and find HER and rub my beak on her hand and say "wwoo". SHE knows that I, for one, appreciate HER yummy yum yum and THAT, Dear Reader is why ONE says "thank you", it is verbal recognition that YOU appreciate that someone has done something for you. And the next time you kiss a baby when it is asleep, watch very carefully, for usually they smile.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 6th, 2012.

Hide and Seek Amongst the Hyacinths.

Good day to you Dear Reader.

How do you have fun? Do you have fun, what do you do to have fun? One of the ways SHE says SHE used to have fun as a child was playing 'Hide and Seek' and SHE told ME a Tale about Dagga-the-Parrot, whom, it appears had a very childlike approach to life, I wonder did HE know that he would die so young?

One day SHE came home, shut Front Door and called out "Hello", normally Dagga-the-Parrot would respond or fly to greet HER, this time, no response and no Parrot-on-the-Wing.

How strange, SHE called his name again and then SHE SEARCHED and SHE searched but, horrifyingly, there was NO sign of HER fat, very beloved Grey Parrot-Person, he was not to be found. Now SHE knew HE had not left the flat as Front Door had been locked and the mosquito net was in place in the back window.

Had HE fallen and was he stuck behind ... No, there was NOTHING he could get stuck behind. SHE was totally mystified. HE had vanished... It was most upsetting and extremely curious, so curious that it was almost beyond belief.

By now it was late, so SHE went into the kitchen which is located in the middle of the flat with a big fire door which opens outwards and SHE was looking in the fridge when suddenly.... someone began to whistle the tune "If you knew Susie like I knew Susie".. Dagga-the-Parrot's famous whistle and SHE looked up at the top of the door and there, as large as life , and he was an extremely large African Grey Parrot, was Dagga-the-Parrot.

I regret to recount that he was looking very smug and frightfully pleased with himself.

SHE was speechless, it doesn't happen often so it must have shocked her, and HE wasn't telling HER where HE has been but HE obviously thought the whole escapade a 'Great Success', norty boy, that HE was.

SHE put HIM to bed in his cage, SHE went to bed and SHE puzzled and puzzled all night long, where HAD he been?

HE pulled this stunt FOUR times on her... and FOUR times she searched high and low for him to no avail, then the fifth time, he got sloppy and SHE got him!

SHE loved to have perfumed flowers in the flat and in the winter time, what are the most fragrant of all flowers, why yes, HYACINTH bulbs. SHE always planted big pots of the dark and the pale blue varities and on the desk, which was in their bedroom, there was an enormous pot of the pale blue variety.

Now SHE never knew when HE was going to play the Hiding Game and one day SHE came in and called out "HELLO".. No answer! SHE walked about the flat and when SHE was in HER bedroom thinking "where is this wretched Parrot", suddenly, her eye registered the most minutest movement, a movement from where there never was any movement.

The movement had come from the bowl of Hyacinths bulbs on her desk, SHE focused on the bowl of Hyacinths and suddenly there HE was, all scrunched up and squashed in between the bulbs.

An African Grey Parrot playing Hide and Seek.

SHE walked over to the desk and said to him in a little soft voice "You've won" and HE laughed.

A very good game indeed.

Geegee Parrot.
January 5th, 2012.

Wednesday 4 January 2012

Gloria.. Salsa and the WHUSHHH Noise!

Gloria Gloria, I wonder how she is getting on?

Some of you who know ME well, have heard me make the WHUSHHH noise and have said to HER "What a curious noise, why does GeeGee make such such a funny sound", well, you can tell THEY'RE not very domesticated, can't you? Do YOU, Dear Reader, know what WHUSHHH means? YOU don't, well, here is the Tale of WHUSHHH.

Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin. Back in the last decade, SHE was very busy working and had clients dropping in at all times to deliver poor sick lamps or to pick up happy mended ones. As the joint, EXCUSE ME, place had to be immaculate at all times, SHE had someone come in once a week and dust, hoover and polish so that everything shone. They also used to do any mending / sewing and generally kept HER clothes sponged and pressed, much better for clothes than the dreaded dry cleaning.

SHE started off with Irena, a charming Polish woman who was ultra efficient and very nice, then Irena left, she left because of guilt, guilt becaused she caused the most dreadful thing to happen which was the death of Dagga-the-Parrot... Another Tale, it makes me SO sad to think of the anguish, heartbreak and sorrow that it caused HER and his Human friends, of whom he had many, HIS lovely Vet, who has known HER since the mid 60's wrote a lovely note to HER when he heard, such a nice man.

One day, Gloria who lived next door to HER, asked HER if she knew anyone who wanted someone for a few hours every week. "Why, yes I do" said HER, "I do", so Gloria came into HER life and Gloria was WONDERFUL, SHE had thought Irena was a good housekeeper, Gloria was special, she was magical and did it in half the time Irena took.

Then I came to live with HER and it was LURVE at first sight, I loved Gloria and Gloria loved me, it was the Original Mutual Admiration Society.

SHE went out when Gloria was here so Gloria could and DID just get on with it! Which was perfect... Because Gloria and I had a secret.. Mama used to leave the radio on for Gloria but what SHE didn't know was that when Gloria had set up the ironing board and had got everything together, spray water bottle + the starch etc, etc, she would switch the radio switch to cd player, slip in one of her cd's, and call me into the room, I'd zoom in, land on top of the door, she'd press start and we would buggie and salsa to our heart's content, her performing miracles with Steam Iron and ME a-flapping-and-a-prancing up and down on the top of the door... and with many high-speed zoom-a-zooms-zooms around the room screaming my lungs out with delight.. thank goodness there's nobody living behind us, as they would have surely called for the padded wagon that takes away crazy folk! But, oh heavens-to-Betsy, WE had such fun!

There's the clue, you have got it, haven't you? For "WHUSHHH" is the voice of Steam Iron that chatted to US as it made HER sheets all crisp and flat.

Put the pointed hat on your head and go and sit in the Dunce's corner if you didn't get it before the last sentence... This is NO place for Dummies or Slackers!

But all great things have a nasty habit of coming to an end.. And one day Gloria came to MY mama with tears streaming down her beautiful face and clutching a letter, her mama was very ill and "please would Gloria come home to Columbia". What else could she do? Of course she had to, she left her fantastically well paid job with the family who adored her, she left US, she left London and all of her friends and she went back. About 3 months later WE got a card saying that she had arrived home to find her mother dying, that she had died and now Gloria had to take her place and bring up the younger children...

She told us that she missed everyone but especially ME. That she had taken some of the money her mother had left her and that she had bought a baby Orange Winged Amazon Parrot, (WE know one called Douglas, he lives with Elaine and they are very cute), that she had looked for an African Grey but that they were just too much money and it seemed crazy when there were, literally, 100's of little Amazon Parrots all wanting a good home.

She sent us her love and a photo of her with the baby Amazon, WE got the odd card about once or twice a year for several years but have not received anything for about a year....

Gloria if you, or if anyone who knows Gloria, is reading MY Blog 'Parrot Tales by GeeGee', please write to us and tell us how you are. WE still live in the same place that YOU used to keep so beautifully for US..

Adios y Vayo con Dios Guapa.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 4th, 2012.

Tuesday 3 January 2012

BAD BAT BEHAVIOUR and DAIRY DIARY DATES.

Whilst SHE was having the HAPPY DAY with BiBi Dearest at Westfield yesterday, BiBi Dearest asked something to the effect of "but don't all Parrots bite / nip?". Dear Reader, this is such a shameful thing to have to admit but yes, WE Parrots do nip. We nip when we are; anxious, hungry, over-excited or jursttt plain grumpy.

And, recently, SHE read somewhere about 'BAD BAT BEHAVIOUR' and recognised it as one of MY behavioural high jinks that SHE had never been privy to with Dagga-the-Parrot, whom I am beginning to believe was a Saint-amongst-Parrots, well, except for the Tale of The Queen Anne Desk, sorry, Dagga-the-Parrot, the TRUTH has to be told and that is a TALE that WILL be told.

BAD BAT BEHAVIOUR involves hanging upside down, holding onto whatever with one claw and trying to connect with whatever part of HER that is within reach of BEAK or claw, yes, Dear Reader, that very same BEAK that grabbed hold of Debi's coffee cup and threw the coffee at her, go back to an earlier BLOG post to read that TALE.

It is a great game, but, blood rushing to ONE's head causes one to lose sight of proper behaviour. I am not sure where it goes to but it goes out of 'Bird Brain'. And the end result of BAD BAT BEHAVIOUR is, that if I am lucky enough to score and catch hold of FINGER, well, poor FINGER gets a nip... The harder the better.... sometimes I score CRUNCH but I better be very quick 'cos SHE has be known to come right back at me with FIST and stick it right in front of BEAK and say in an extremely FIERCE voice "Smell this and tremble"!
And I do.

I am THANKFUL that this is, usually, the only time I nip HER. Mind you, SHE's swift to retaliate even to nip, LIGHT goes out and I am left hanging upside down in pitch darkness!

Not a nice place to be. So flapping (swiftly) along in order to change THE subject...

Here are some vital dates for YOUR diaries .. Ellie's DAIRY DIARY DATES for January.

We will post the exact addresses / locations in plenty of time but these are the dates.

Saturday, January 14th, 2012. BALHAM. NO snide remarks about Balham being the Gateway to the South please.

Sunday, January 29th, 2012. Parson's Green Farmer's Market. Actually located way down the King's Road in the school yard, just before the road turns to join the Fulham Road.

Go online and order your milk... Ellie will bring YOUR reserved GOATY MILK with her. It comes by the Pint, in either 1 or 2 Pint bottles. Ellie also brings Cheese and Soap with her, check out the website @ www.elliesdairy.co.uk.

AND .... Go and READ ELLIE's BLOG... You won't believe how NORTY those Goaty Folk can be!

With which, I am signing off... SHE is going out to Covent Garden clutching BASKET, no, not Wicker Trolley's Basket, this is woven basket which SHE puts over HER shoulder. SHE's put in BIG Camera, HER bag and SHE wants iPad, so I've got to have to stop writing now. SHE's going to the APPLE STORE to load iPad up with all sorts of APS.

Well, that was the plan, until she opened the front door and got blown back in by the gale force winds and torrential rain. What horrid weather. Change of plan, SHE took street wear off, got into house-cleaning-clothes and proceeded to rip the front room apart. Vacuum got dragged out of his cosy cupboard, dusters taken out of the house-keepers drawer, SHE irons her dusters.. not another word is going to escape my beak about what else SHE irons.. But yes, SHE likes clean and ironed dusters!

Whenever I saw signs of flagging aka giving up, I whizzed about to cheer the troop on. It IS very dreary work housework, so I flapped and whistled and hung upside down from MY gym ring, yes, DEAR READER, I have a gym with excercise bars and ropes AND beautiful bells, courtesy of Clock-Mender David, whose whereabouts are unknown which is very sad, sigh. Back to cheering on HER, I also said "Hello" in Mysterious Man's voice a couple of times and I did my very special WHUSHHH noise. Now the origin of that noise, that's an extremely good Tale for another day! Just thinking about that tale makes ME laugh and I STAR in it!

Books, books, books... I swear they rub together and have babies, they are everywhere. What does she see in all those words? Give HER a book and she's off to another place ...

Pamela-Follower is a GREAT book giver, she gave HER some good books which are, apparently, really wonderful reads. SHE misses Pamela, she used to be in the office @ St.Columba Church of Scotland, but now she's living and working in Oxfordshire, this way she doesn't have to commute or have to live between a flat in London and their home, she married Paul in December 2010, in a glorious, glorious dress which was bewitching in its' beauty, she looked exquisite and at the reception, she and Paul danced a dance which was very sexy and a man for whom Pam had worked before said "wow" and wow, it was... wow.

BAD NEWS.. The holidays are over.. Oh, woe is me, SHE goes to do her volunteer work tomorrow and doesn't take me, there are some people who work there with her who don't like birds, so I get LEFT BEHIND, SHE says the dreaded word 'STAY' and out of the door SHE goes.

But, don't be sad, let's be happy.. Because if SHE is starting HER volunteer work then going to the STUDIO must be any day now..... WE will see Lovely Assistant and dear, dear Studio Owner whom I love dearly, even if I did give her a small nip, just to show that I could, as it were.

As SHE will be on her feet all day tomorrow it is an early bedtime for us dollies... That is why SHE has written and is posting the Blog tonight rather than in the morning which is when she usually writes it.

Yawn.. Sleep well.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 3rd, 2012.

SPECIAL EDITION... Hot off the press ... GRANNY'S BACK IN TOWN... Read all about it..

You read it here first....

Yes, Dear Reader, there is a God after all. Well, WE knew there was all the time but THIS news is beyond wonderful!

Granny emailed HER last night to say she is starting GRANNY's classes again in late February.

GRANNY, who shall always be known as Granny, is like Studio Owner, they take something and they work on & with it and hey presto, hey-li-cheese, it changes into something else, they are both Artists and Magicians.

Granny works on bodies, live one's, the bodies lie on mats and Granny talks them through strange and weird movements and in time, and IF body's brain has been concentrating and not just lolling about wasting body's time, a TRULY miraculous thing happens, body's shape changes.

And although Muscle complained and Fat says, well, it wouldn't be polite to say on THIS Blog what Fat said when WE told it that SHE was going to be going back to Granny's. SHE'll be on a mat, so will Studio Owner, who has a problem with her back and neck, from years of standing at drawing tables. Not good for poor back.

Go to GRANNY's and get back better!

I'll recount the TALE of how SHE and Granny met in 1975 in another post.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 3rd, 2012.

OTHER PEOPLE' HABITS.

Are 'pretty' strange, aren't they? Dear Reader, you must be aware, unless you are not really concentrating and merely flipping through MY BLOG to waste time, in which case, please don't, the fact you'll be aware of, of course, is that SHE and I enjoy our food.

SHE even enjoys shopping for it. Mind you, SHE does have the invaluable, old Wicker Trolley, who, despite Basket being a bit broken and in dire need of a reweave, trundles along with her and together THEY go all over London to search out weird and wonderful places to purchase delicious food.

Now you know SHE loves Singapore Rice Noodles, well, my favourite thing to eat is Humous.. and the more Garlicky the better! And I like Pink Stuff as we call it, you would know it as Taramasalata. Our local shops sell it in two forms, Artisan / home-made or commercially made stuff, it is pretty gruesome, with little garlic and horribly expensive for a measly amount. Now, I can slurp my way through those small pots of Humous in no time, so SHE went looking for the proper stuff in industrial quantities. SHE found it.. SHE always 'get's her man', like The Canadian Mounties.

Faaaar away from where WE live, on other side of London, beyond The Angel and Kingsland Road is Dalston Junction. Almost opposite the train station is a street market which can only be described as where Black Africa meets Asia. One of her friends is a young woman from the Cameroons, she sells great handbags that you never see anywhere else, another is Leila, a beautiful Turk!

And Leila runs an amazing shop for at the very top of The Ridley Road Market, the Stoke Newington end, is a wonderful Emporium called 'The Turkish Food Centre'. Oh, Sacred-Dagga-the-Parrot-in-the-Sky, I am eternally grateful that you guided HER to this place.

For they are purveyors of the finest quality Humous AND The Pink Stuff and it comes in truly industrial sizes. 1 and 2 Kilo boxes.

My 'Bird Brain' has been known to wander when food is the subject, concentrate GeeGee... Right, back to 'Strange Habits'. One of the Sites that SHE reads avidly is called laylita.com, Dear Reader, THIS gurl knows her onions! HuHUH.. Her recipes are scrummydumptious and Ellie from Ellie's Dairy and I both agree that the Cheese Tart that Laylita posted a couple of days ago, would be "just fab with Goaty Folk Cheese".

But, that's not the reason why I write about Laylita, I write about her because she wrote about yes, you've got it, things that people do and, in her case, the people are South Americans.

The following things are from a selection of how they celebrate New Year's Eve.

The first is to run around the block with an EMPTY suitcase, apparently this will bring you good travels and adventure in the New Year. Words fail me.. you know THAT it has to be pretty serious for words to fail ME, the sight of HER creeping out with HER suitcase, I bet SHE was praying no one would see her, and RUNNING around the gardens wirh it, I was speechless with laughter, luckily it took some time and I was able to compose my features before she came back in.

The next one is quite simple. You wear coloured underwear.. Yellow for Prosperity and Red for Love. This may seem a bit disloyal but SHE did look quite weird wearing both sets.

Studio Owner told her that Shakespeare said that Red and Yellow clothing signified 'The Fool', I hope not, I was looking forward to a few more treats and fewer 'anxious' moments this year.

Now I have the greatest admiration for Laylita, she's a cracking food writer so I would never put in writing anything hurtful or let alone think anything. But you've got to agree, they are certainly 'unusual habits', aren't they?

However, all the rest of Laylita's recommendations are either delicious or hysterically funny, especially the one where men dress up as widows! No No.. you go and check out her website, they are too lengthy for me to copy out, the recipe for Ceviche is mind blowingly delicious and perfect if you are intent on becoming a slimmer person!

We had a very early start this morning... Yawn. I was fast asleep but SHE gave me
me a sliver of Persimmon and that got my act into flap mode pretty fast.

GeeGee Parrot.
January 3rd, 2012.

Monday 2 January 2012

Seven Brides for Seven Brothers and other Films.

SHE got an email from Joanna Darcy a couple of days ago. Joanna is the Blogger who writes La Vie en Rose. She and Jean-Jacques lived in Paris when fhey were newly married and Joanna recently started her Blog with a couple of stories about # 1 & # 2 son, she has SEVEN SONS, and J-J, eight men and one woman in one house, brave gurl.

Anyway, she queried whether she should write about them all, or to keep the material for a book, what to do, what to do? SHE replied... "Write it all down, every Tale you can remember because they won't be able to remember the anecdotes and I think it is important that the stories and facts are written down because time will pass and someone will ask their bigger brother what about so & so, and they won't remember but a Blog gives them access to what went down as it were, as it happened".

Do you remember the film 'Seven Brides for Seven Brothers', how many Grandchildren must Joanna & J-J have?

The other reason SHE told Joanna to write it down was it is MUCH easier to cull stories than to suddenly have to remember them, if everything is written, the really great stories POP right off their pages and those are the one's that are Book Material. Isn't SHE right LuLU, who is a Professional Editor and writes the most excellent 'Unofficial Guide Book to London', the 6th edition should be being started on sometime soon.

Have you read The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo? It is a good book which SHE read earlier last year BUT the film is BETTER and SCARY indeed, there were bits in it that had HER disappearing in HER chair.

SHE says the whole concept and the buildings are brilliant and as it is close to Hammersmith, it is easy to get to. An extremely good place to go and see a film and eat lunch or supper.

From what she has described, it is amazing, I would love to go and see it as it sounds open and light and I would have fun zooming about and up and down, ever since MY flight UP the stairs at the Studio, I've been remembering the old workshop in Deptford, it was an old, under the railway arches, building and I flew happily up and down until I was too tired to flap any more.

I am now waiting for HER to get the cooking act together, SHE may not want much to eat but I want some steamed Broccoli. I bet SHE ate Singapore Rice Noodles with HOT Chilli Oil. It is true that you take the gurl out of Malaya but you can't take the Malayan Food out of the gurl!

GeeGee Parrot.
January 2nd, 2012.