Thursday 3 April 2014

WHEN DAGGA PARROT & PETER PIGEON HAD TO BE 'RESCUED'..

Good evening Dear Readers, I don't mean to confuse you if it is approaching midday where you are, your clock / watch is not wrong, but it is evening time here in deepest Knightsbridge.

Now the title is somewhat alarming I do agree but read on and you will laugh as well as smile.

So with no more ado.. here is the Tale of how Messrs D.Parrot and P.Pigeon were rescued.

Way back in the 90's she was having a 'bit' of a problem with the man who actually owns the house. He did not want to do any repairs on a wall which was seriously wet, forget about being damp, this wall at the back of her flat was wet and he was dragging his toes about doing any repairs.

Letters were not replied to, he would not take her telephone calls, so one day, being now very bored by the whole situation and having had to drag everything away from this wall, she telephoned the Environmental Dept. of the local council.

She was put through to a man and he said "who is your landlord?", she gave him the name and he 
roared with laughter and said "my name is Bob Campbell, are you in this afternoon, if you are, I'll be with you at 4pm".

Sharp at 4pm.. rat-a-tat-tat on her door, she opened it to find a smiley face, big, tall man standing there with his id card. She let him in and they walked to the back of the flat.

He took one look at the wall, reached into a bag, took out a damp measure and stuck it into the wall. The measure ricocheted off the scale and he turned to her and laughed.

Laughter, she thought, what is so funny? And said so. He explained how powerful he was and that the next thing he was going to do was to telephone the landlord, she went to give him the number, he smiled and said not to worry, that he knew her landlord of old.

He dialled the number and spoke to the secretary (who obviously had been instructed never to put her through to her boss), she realised Mr.Campbell was being given the same runaround, as his smiley face disappeared and he said "tell him that it is Mr.Campbell, the senior Environmental Health Officer and if he does not take my call now, I will declare this house unfit for human habitation".

He was put through immediately.

The repairs works were (miraculously) put into action for the next monday, she, knowing the landlord and his tricks only too well, refused to move out but with builders going backwards and forwards and lots of brick dust flying about.. what was she going to do with her two birds?

She spoke with lovely Colin who ran Animal Fair up in Kensington and explained the situation. That Dagga Parrot would have been ok to send to the aviary but Peter Pigeon? Not a snowballs chance of him allowing anyone to put him in a cage!

He said that he would speak to a friend of his, she was as mad as her and had a houseful of animals including birds, two more would be no trouble!

Sure enough, this divine woman telephoned her the next morning and said "Bring them over, I live in Chiswick".

The next day with Dagga Parrot in his big cage, Peter Pigeon in her African shopping basket, she went by taxi to Chiswick and met Jane Tremblett.

Such kindness from a total stranger, someone who quite understood her predicament and was willing to help.. what a saviour.

The building works took forever, first the guttering had to be repaired, they had no access to the flat whose patio is behind her, so everything had to come over a very high wall. The water had seeped through to next door.. it was a gruesome mess.

Dear Bob, as he was now called, used to come in and 'inspect the works' twice a week.. bless that man's heart.

She spoke with Jane frequently and went to see the 'boys' as Jane called them, but she always used to go during the day time before the family came home.

One day Jane telephoned squealing with laughter and said "come for supper, there is something you just have to see, come on friday at about 5.30".

So taking some yumyum with her as a gift, she went to Chiswick, to be greeted by Jane saying "shhhh, he must not know you are here" and took her to a room she had never been into before. 

It was a terrace house and the wall between the two rooms in the front had had a hole knocked through, where she was standing was in the back room and there was a desk with a computer on it. Jane said "stand here and I'll start it".

Very strange she thought but lent against the wall behind the door to await for whatever it was that was about to happen.

Jane called for Tom her son and said "You can use the computer now" and her son appeared. He sat at the computer having smiled at her and put a finger to his lips.. he obviously knew what was going on or about to happen!

The front bit of the room was set up as a sitting room with a comfy sofa and chairs etc.

A Cairn Terrier appeared, she knew this dog to be called Ralphie. He headed straight for the comfy sofa and settled down at one end and fixed a beady eye on his young master. 

Then who should strut through the door as if he owned the joint but Peter Pigeon.  

He headed straight for the sofa, jumped up and then jumped up again onto the back of the sofa.
He strutted along the back of the sofa around to above where Ralphie was settled comfortably and then proceeded to make a very loud racket, an oompha noise, is the only way to describe this noise.

Poor Ralphie, who had just got comfortable, sighed and moved off down to the other end of the sofa and young Master Peter slid down into the nicely warmed-up spot! She had to bite her lip.. 

Tom then called out "Terry, come on, Terry, Terry" and within a few minutes, there was a very curious thumping sound as if something was bumping its' way down the stairs.. and in walked a Miniature Toucan!

Who settled itself next to Tom's chair and seemed to go to sleep.. the size of these Toucans may be miniature but they have a full sized very, very sharp Beaky.

By now, she had realised that this was not a one-off and when Tom said "watch what happens now" she knew something was about to happen!

Sure enough, young beady eyed Peter had lifted sharp little Beaky out of his chest and slid, no other word describes this movement, off the sofa and disappeared out of the door at that end. 

He must have scuttled his way down the hall, because the next thing she knew was that he was creeping through the door which was beside her.

Tom said "I hope you're watching 'cos it happens really fast".. Peter continued to creep up until he was behind Terry Toucan, who was fast asleep, little Beaky pulled Terry's tail and he turned and ran for the door, he ran up the hall, through the other doorway and jumped back up onto the sofa.. and looked as if he had never moved.

Jane walked in and said "did he do it again?", she would not get any sense out of Tom or her, they were witless with laughter and then there was even more laughter as Master Peter realised that his Mum was there.

He threw himself off the sofa and coming straight down the room literally jumping for joy at the sight of her.

She picked him up and they went through into the back of the house where the dining room / kitchen were to where Mr.Dagga Parrot was in residence.

Such laughter, such hugging, kissing and lots of fuss was made of her 'boys'. Dagga tooted and whistled and was so happy as he sat on her shoulder and rubbed Beaky on her jaw.

Jane explained over supper as to how how this extraordinary sequence of bizarre events had started and how that Terry, daft bird, forgot every evening that Peter would pull her tail if she went to sleep!

She, of course, no longer has these two birds. For Darling Dagga died in 2004 and Precious Pete died in 2008 at a very ripe old age, for a Feral Dove, of 18.

But oh gosh, it makes her laugh to think about this charming Tale that happened twenty years ago. 

Tom would be about thirty now. The family moved away from London some years ago but thank goodness for a sharp memory and Jane Tremblett, the total stranger who took in her two 'boys' and, literally, gave them the run of her house.

There are very nice people out there as well, we are happy to be able to tell you.

GeeGee Parrot.
April 2nd, 2014.

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