"Please come to Borough on either Friday or Saturday and bring WW with you" was the message from Debbie.. aka Goaty Mum. Friday she was being a tiny cog in a very large wheel of volunteers and so it was yesterday in the morning that she took a bottle of something non-alcoholic, a bar of White Toblerone (who knew it even existed!) and after kissing Beaky, she and WW left for Borough.
Ooh, lots of folk about! A huge amount of foreign tourists milling about not quite knowing where to go next, so she sent a bunch of FIFTY Japanese to Westfield at Stratford, knowing that would keep them all entertained and fed on what was a cold and damp day!
She slipped onto the Jubilee Line as well and got out at London Bridge with the Japanese all waving and shouting "Thank you" at her as she left the carriage. Such a great connection.. zoom, it is only four very quick stops and you're there, by bus, it would take ages!
Borough Market was heaving with tourists and last minute shoppers!
She slipped in the back way and appeared like a genie at the side of the Ellie's Goat Stall.. piles of delicious cheese greeted her plus two, slightly weary looking, friends Debbie and Joe. Getting up at the crack of dawn every day, milking, bottling, making cheese, feeding goats.. it ain't a life for the faint hearted folks. It fact it ain't an easy life for any farmer, whether they be farming arable or stock.
She kissed her friends and produced the bottle, which upon inspection, it would not heat up well.. it was Fizzy Lingonberry & Apple from Mr. Ikea. Joe was asked to nick three glasses from Boisdales.
They toasted each other and then Debbie said "Ah good, you've brought Wicker Wheelie, I'll go and get your presents from the van" and disappeared.
Mum flogged some curd and didn't see Debbie reappear until she said "Happy Christmas" to her and she turned to see.. two metal tubes sticking out of WW's basket! Metal tubes that looked suspiciously like the two halves of a trimmer!
"WHAT, no, you haven't, you got me the trimmer?" She said 'the' trimmer because 'Master Mechanic' David who knows all about things like trimmers and hedge cutters, had tried to mend her old one but had pronounced its' disease incurable and that he had recommended another which was sold by an agent in Kent. And here it was! Tried and tested by David himself to make sure that it worked.
"And there's a bag of goodies in there as well, no peeking until tomorrow" said Debbie.
Now it get it home.. without frightening everyone who saw it! The giant Lidl bag came out of WW and was unpended over the 'scary' metal tubes and after kissing everyone again, off she went.
The trip was uneventful, until she got to Green Park where several armed Policemen where very much in evidence. You can't get WW through the small barriers and so she had to go up to the big barrier where one VERY large Metropolitan cop was standing holding his gun.
He surely had xray eyes for as she stopped to get her pass out of her pocket, he asked her "What's under the bag Miss" and she said "a Christmas present of a grass trimmer" and pulled off the bag to expose the two parts. He looked at the trimmer with a straight face and said "Well, that's just what a real 'girl' needs for Christmas, isn't it, what have you got, a wild garden or an allotment? Happy Christmas Eve Miss".
She wished him and his family the same, picked up WW and walked up the steps onto Piccadilly. Yes, Piccadilly! For the road that runs from Hyde Park Corner upto Piccadilly Cicus IS Piccadilly.
She came home squeaking with excitement about trimmers but.. unlike when she was a child, she did NOT open the bag that was in WW, nor did she investigate further the trimmer, infact, I think she's finally growing up, for there is a gift from her much beloved Pat which has been sitting on her desk in the bedroom for two weeks and she hasn't even given it as much as a squeeze!
It is time to get up and start our day. With coffee and scrambled eggs with delicious curd and smoked salmon. Then we will sit and she'll read the instructions of the trimmer, see what's in Debbie's bag, she'll open Pats' gift and at 2.00pm we are going upstairs to Les Filles for Christmas lunch.
I do hope that whomever you are, wherever you are and whatever religion you are, accept that just as you celebrate your religious holidays, you realise we mean no offence when we say "Happy Christmas to you all" because, after all, she is a Christian and we celebrate this day, the symbolic day of the Birth of Christ.
GeeGee Parrot.
December 25th, 2016.
PostScript: I do hope she doesn't plan to give me a Chrismas bath.
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